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SINGLE MALT WHISKY HAIKUS

One of the more lively threads on the Malts-L listserver recently was when Lex suggested that it might be interesting to try to write some whisky haikus.  The response was amazing and quite a few were written by PLOWED members.  Dave and I wrote a few Ardbeggeddon-specific ones on the drive to Las Vegas from Los Angeles... 

Also, if interested in haikus, you should probably also check out these additional resources:

Malts-L Whisky Haikus from CelticMalts.com - compiled by Lex Kraaijeveld (malt whisky scholar and explorer extraordinaire!)

Microsoft Error Message Haikus


Here are the Ardbeggeddon Haikus first followed by the more generic ones.

PLOWED AND ARDBEGGEDDON-RELATED HAIKUS

Ardbeggeddon's here
Rare drams overflow the table
Drammage quotient high

Fair Local Barley
soon lipped at Ardbeggeddon
A legend is born

Lord of the Isles, Aye,
Your peat and smoke assail me
Ardbeggeddon Rocks!

Oh Ardbegeddon!
January in Vegas.
I'll not dram my age.

The look on Roy's face
Like a deer in the headlights
Loch Dhu ...not Black Bow?

Whisky treasures hide
Days spent searching dusty shelves
Trying to FOAF FoaF

Glenhavens, Springers
Dumpy Cadenheads, OBs
FOAFing Las Vegas
 
A3 a success
Keeper lips local barley
See you next year Ulf

I used to love Bowmore
But now my nose takes offense
FWP

Nectar of the gods
The mistress of discipline
Spanky earned his stripes

Thursday night malt chat
The theme is Glen-whatever
I'll be hosed again!

An A2 Recollection...

Shamu has surfaced
Cask strength chili relleno
Call housekeeping now

SINGLE MALT WHISKY HAIKUS FROM MALT-L

Salt in Laphroaig?
No sodium detected!
Hallucination.

Malt distillation's
not transubstantiation,
just a close second.

alchemy's wonders
changing wort into whisky
miracle on earth

Take putrid Loch Dhu.
Would you like Pepsi with that?
How else to drink it?

Then there's Old Rhosdu
Unusual when too young
Like sucking on hay.

Ardbeg Scotch Whisky -
The monster of peat and smoke
is my pet at home

Lamented Fer'ntosh
Scotland's Bard's favourite dram
now lost to us all

Mr. Creosote
repulsive as a Python
beautiful in malt

Alas silent stills.
Oh Ferintosh, sadly lost,
Back again someday?

Blue flame burns beneath
water malted barley yeast
then still waters sleep

Glenmorangie stills
with odd lot barrels produce
collectors nightmares

Ah, Local Barley!
Elixir of Campbeltown
Springbank forever!

Campbeltown treasures
Springbank, Longrow, Hazelburn
And someday Glen Gyle!

Just above Islay
What a joy, the angels share
...and thank God for that.

Great fun!  If any of these are your haikus and you'd like to  be identified as the author send me an email to DrE (at) SMWhisky.com and I'll edit the page.


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Last Update on 8/24/02